I FUA! - I Fucked Up Anonymous
by CelticHeart13
Summary: One shot. If fairy Tail's version of Alcoholic Anonymous but just the screw ups. My first story ever! Please play nice There is cursing.


(It's - I Foo-Ahh)

A/N This is my first ever story and post online.

I'd like to thank Aprilll! Since it was her awesomesauce BixLu that gave me this idea.

Seriously Souls & Spirits go read it... do it, do it now lol ^_~

I own nothing! Mashima owns it all!

A cheery and smiling Mira Jane approached the small podium and cleared her throat to gain the attention of the room. Sadly tho as it always was when Fairy Tail members are involved, no one could hear her over the brawling. Trying once more and failing she reverted to her Satan's Soul.

Feeling the overbearing presents of her dark aura the room soon came to silence.

"Now that's better," She smiled " Hello everyone! And welcome to I FUA, I Fucked Up Anonymous! I am your sponsor Mira Jane. Now this is our first meeting, so let's go around the room. Introduce yourselves and tell your reason for being here"

Looking around the room and seeing no one willing to stand and be the first to speak up. Mira huffed, scanned the group and picked the one person who looked like they would rather be anywhere else, even doing paper work then to be there.

"Laxus, how about you start us off" She smiled sweetly her demon aura slowly seeping back out.

"Shit" he mumbled

"What was that?"

"Nothing! I'm here..." He started before being cutoff

"Tell everyone your name and why you're here and stand up"

"What is this AA?" he scoffed

"Well we are using their rec hall" Mira smiled sweetly once more, "now go on"

"Fine! Laxus Dreyar and I shouldn't be here" he smirked which was answered by a Satan Soul Mira who was getting annoyed with the groups growing antics.

"Try again" She said daring him to push her

"Tch, I'm here because I attacked the book worm and refused to help when called unless Lucy would be my girl" He looked to Bickslow who just grumbled, "I also forced my family to fight each other because I saw them as weak little flys"

"And..." Mira lead on

Huffing he finished, "And it may have caused gramps to have a heart attack. Which proved he should of handed the guild over"

"LAXUS"

"Fine and now I'm trying to learn about everyone and gain trust so I can be Guild Master when the time comes" Huffing he slouched back into his seat and turning his sound pod up, while trying to ignore the room.

"Bickslow how about you" She smiled

He sighed, stood up and began "My name's Bickslow and I'm here because I fucked up. I tried to beat my girlfriend Lucy for being weak before she was my girlfriend... twice. Which she won... twice" his babies floating around his head chanting 'twice! tiwce!' as he continued "And I can't get over the guilt, so she sent me here... Not like I really need to be here" he grumbled

"Yes you do" Mira smiled once more "Alright who's next? Gajeel?"

Gajeel grumbles and refuses to get up.

"Gajeel" Mira warned her aura coming back in full force "Do I need to call Erza in as well?"

"This is so fucking stupid" Gajeel mumbled as he refused to get up. Before Mira could get to him a small blur flew over and crashed into his head... Hard. Knocking him out of his chair.

"DA FUCK?!" He roared

The answering cackling laughter from a certain Seith mage clued him in. Bickslow's babies twirling in the air giggling.

"If I gotta do this shit then so do you metal head" Laxus griped

"Just cause you're scared of the demon doesn't mean I am"

Suddenly Mira appeared before Gajeel, anger clear on her face as her hair started to rise with her power, "What was that?" She asked smirking when he coward back a step

"Alright alright, I'm here cause I kidnapped and brutalized his girlfriend" He pointed to Bickslow and continued, "And pinned her best friend / my girlfriend to a tree and ... This... This is still stupid" He growling seating himself once more.

Knowing that was the most she would get out of him. She started looking around the room once more, Mira picked her next 'victim', "Cobra"

"Tch, you don't scare me demon" Cobra lounged in the chairs in the far back of the room

"You are doing this for the council are you not? To prove you are a changed person and deserve to be out of prison. Or do you like being kept behind bars?" She arched her brow waiting for his response. Which came with the scraping of his chair sliding back.

"Cobra, I kidnapped soul boy's girl and tried to kill her and her team while trying to take over the world... twice"

"Anything else?" Mira questioned

"... And my friend turned into a 'real' girl and I don't do or like this Pinocchio shit"

"Okay then," Sighing heavily Mira peered around the room once more before asking, "Is there anyone here who HASN'T tried to kill, maimed or kidnap Lucy Heartphillia?" No's could be heard from most of the room, causing Mira to face palm.

"Who will speak next?" She was quiet surprised when a flash of salmon colored hair appeared and called out.

"I'll go! Then Luce said she wont be mad at me anymore" Natsu grinned hand behind his head scratching his neck.

"What'd you do this time?" Laxus's peeked open an eye, an amused smirk spreading across his face

"HI! I'm Natsu and this is Happy"

"Aye Sir!" he waved

"And I'm here because I accidentally burned down Luce's bathroom door while she was in the bath"

"WHAT! You saw MY girlfriend naked?! AGAIN!" Bickslow erupted jumping to his feet

"It was an accident! I swear" Natsu defended

"I'll show you an accident, X formation babies!" He prepared his attack, his eyes glowing beneath his visor with his anger

"I said it was an accident!" Natsu yelled running and stepping on Gajeel, using him like a spring board in his attempt to flee from Bickslow

"OI FLAMEBRAIN! You think you can use me as a doormat!" Gajeel hopped up launching his iron pole arm, missing as Natsu ducked and hitting another I FUA member who was speaking to Mira

"Hitting a man when he's not looking is UNMANLY" Elfman threw himself into the fight, tossing a chair. As it goes flying and hitting Cobra, dragging him into the fight.

"Tch, what a bunch of mor..." Laxus being cuff off by a flying Bickslow. Bickslow using his fearless leader as a launch pad and yelling for Natsu. Growling Laxus rose to his feet, lightening crackling around him. "That's it!" He roared while subsquintly shocking the shit out of everyone but Mira.

Smiling while standing next to a worried looking Master Makarov, "Well I think this has been a very productive first meeting" She giggled happily

"You brats will be the death of me!" Makarov wailed as a wall completely crumbled to dust


End file.
